Last month when our tenant moved out we were unable to get another until January, thereby losing a month’s rent when my husband is out of his seasonal work. I have learned to think that only HaShem is the source of our provision and that He uses many ways, but if one is closed, He will use another. So in my Hitbodedut I thanked Him that I knew I did not need to worry as He has shown that He will always provide what we need. I said it would be nice if I had some work to do at home that could fill the gap. The next day I got an email from an author saying I had been recommended as a good transcriptionist and he was in need of having some interview tapes transcribed. He was willing to pay a very good rate. Already I have recouped half the lost month’s income and there are at least as many tapes left to transcribe. It removes so much stress to know we have a Father we can go to who loves us and will always help us according to his wisdom and kindness. I think Rav Cassouto’s teachings that HaShem wants to hear from us, for us to turn to Him in everything, and no matter our past, we can still come close to Him, has been great encouragement for me. And when I hear many people say, “You shouldn’t think of G-d all the time” and “It’s extreme to pray so much,” it’s so reassuring that actually the desire to do so is a gift, and God’s mercy that He gives us guidance to come closer to Him in that way. It is so freeing when difficulties come and you don’t know what to do that in a flash of remembrance you can exclaim “Why be downcast, I have a Father! A Father who can do anything, and a Father who cares about me. I can go to Him!” Last year we were given a cheque that was insufficient and it was going to cause our own account to bounce important payments. My husband tried to arrange making a payment to cover it, but it could not be in time. I went to pray. By the time I finished speaking about the situation to HaShem and asking for His help, the bank called to say that they had contacted the other bank and everything had been straightened out and no cheques would bounce and no overdraft charges would be made. These are just two instances, but HaShem is constantly answering prayers both large and small.
eggy, Parnassa comes from Hashem!